Decades ago J.B. Phillips wrote a slim
but provocative book titled Your God Is Too Small. In it he
exposed our often inadequate and distorted view of God in 17
chapters. Just to outdo him, I have come up with 19 ways I have
personally observed over the years in which our church congregations
so often fall short of the model Jesus gave us. I will admit that I
am probably in a rather down mood at the present time and am using
this post and a companion post as a means to unload some of my
frustrations.
But the first thing to point out is an
old saying I have heard: “If you ever manage to find the perfect
church, don't join it or it will no longer be perfect.” It seems to
be all too often that any time people get hold of something designed
by God, they go out of their way to change it to meet their own
personal needs and desires rather than His.
The Accommodating Church By this
I mean that there are times when we try to be all things to all
people and end up satisfying no one. I attended a very small start-up
congregation years ago in upstate NY where almost everyone in the
area was either Roman Catholic or Jewish. But local industry had a
way of transferring in a few people from other parts of the country
who could be characterized as Bible-believing Protestants. Under
those circumstances, it was common for those few people to band
together and attend any church that was even remotely like the ones
they had left behind.
Our small church was a sort of haven
for those outcasts, but it took a constant effort on our part to
maintain unity and minister to everyone equally. It actually worked
fairly well for a while even though our Sunday morning song service
was a bone of contention since we had both “high” and “low”
church attendees. During the more old Gospel hymn singing, there was
at least one person who scowled through the whole song and pointedly
refused to join in unless the hymn came straight out of the early
Reformation. But others in the congregation were wanting to sing even
more of these devotional and emotional songs and took to meeting at
one person's house during the week to have a sing-fest around a
piano. This self-appointed unofficial leader of our church found out
about what they were doing and demanded that I (who was church
chairman at the time) tell them to stop immediately. When pressed, he
could give no coherent justification for his demand other than the
fact that they were somehow going around his authority.
The Social Club For a couple of
years my wife and I attended another small congregation in New York.
The Sunday sermons were not at all bad although the denomination was
a little more liberal than I was used to. The main problem came in
with the people in the congregation. We became somewhat friendly with
one couple, who proceeded to let us in on all the wife-swapping which
was taking place behind the scenes.
And the adults obviously did not set a
good example at home, as I found out when I volunteered to teach the
high school Sunday school class for a while. I wanted to teach
something they would be interested in so I gave them an anonymous
questionnaire to fill out on our first meeting. It included several
potential subject to choose between, and I also included a probing
question which simply said, “If you had your choice, would you
rather be anywhere else on Sunday morning than church?” Their
unanimous response to that one was a resounding “Yes.” So I
leveled with them the next week and told them that we were stuck
together so we might as well make the best of it. That attitude was
found in the adults as well, as we learned when Summer came around
and the only adult class that was offered was on gardening.
Church as a Mere Tradition One
man in our car pool while in New York attended a mainstream
Protestant denomination in which he was always heckled as he left his
car to walk into the church building carrying a Bible. The men
standing outside openly jeered at him and asked, “Who do you think
you are? I suppose you feel you are holier than the rest of us.” My
Roman Catholic roommates in graduate school told similar stories
about growing up in congregations where the adults routinely made fun
of Catholic practices in rather sacreligious ways.
A Weekly Dose of Preventative
Medicine I once
attended a rather large congregation (I won't mention the
denomination) as a guest of a friend at work. I was a little shocked
to see that a large proportion of the attendees milled around the
large anteroom during service talking to one another until it was
announced that the taking of the Eucharist was beginning. At that
point they charged through the door to be the first in line and then
left as soon as they could. That may sound extreme, but I have
belonged to other churches where some of the people would never miss
a Sunday, but on the other hand seemed to get very little out of the
service other than to satisfy themselves that they had done their
weekly duty.
The Casual Church
There was a small independent start-up congregation only a few
blocks away from our house in another city. The people seemed
friendly and I was impressed when the pastor took time before the
main service to ask if there were any prayer requests from the
congregation. He then started his sermon, but at a certain point
right in the middle of a thought, he looked at his watch and abruptly
said, “Well, I guess that's enough for today. Perhaps I'll finish
it up some other time.” I got the distinct impression that he was
sort of winging the whole thing.
The Unfriendly Church
My wife and I had moved to a new town and were trying out
congregations in the area. We showed up ahead of time and milled
around without anyone saying a word to us. Then we sat down for the
service, which included at one point an invitation for everyone to
greet one another. Not a single person even looked in our direction.
After the service was over and we were leaving I noticed that there
was a folding table set up in the entryway with a sign saying
“Visitor's Center” and a woman seated behind it. We waited and
waited for her to pay attention to the fact we were standing there,
but she was gabbing with a friend and couldn't be bothered. Needless
to say, we never came back.
The Cowed Church
I only visited my wife's old church once and that was more than
enough. The problem was not with the members of the congregation at
all. They impressed me as sincere, blue collar working people who
were deeply religious. The problem was with the guest speaker they
had that week. He ran an independent “Bible college” and had a
weekly radio program. He drove up in his new Cadillac and parked it
at the side of the church so that it wouldn't be damaged by any of
the older model cars in the parking lot. He spent his whole “sermon”
literally berating the congregation for not being as devoted to
Christ as he was as well as scaring them to death with a horror story
of a young boy who played hooky one Sunday morning to fly a kite. The
kite supposedly got caught in some overhead electrical wires and the
boy was electrocuted. At the funeral, the grieving mother came up to
the speaker and asked for assurance that her boy was in heaven. His
prompt reply to her was, “Your boy is rotting in hell this very
minute!”
At that point, I
was on the verge of walking out and would have if my wife hadn't held
me back. I don't know what angered me more: the absurdity of the
made-up story or the fact that he would brag about his own totally
depiccable part in it. In either case, the sermon ended up, as
expected, with a demand for a love offering for his ministry while
shaming the audience for them “not having the guts” to follow God
the way he did.
The only similar
experience I had was when on vacation in New Hampshire. We happened
upon a medium-sized church when Sunday school was starting. I guess
my wife and I looked young enough at the time to fit in with the
young adults class, taught by the pastor who also ran a “Bible
college” during the week. I believe the subject was out of Jude,
and one of the young men in the audience raised his hand and asked
about a particularly difficult verse concerning the afterlife.
Instead of addressing that question, which I doubt the pastor could
have done in any case, he jumped all over the poor young man yelling,
“You have been reading Catholic literature, haven't you!!” We
didn't bother staying for the main service.
The Political, Self-Centered,
Business-Modeled, Head-in-the-Sand, Rigidly-Doctrinal, Flawlessy
Conducted Church Somewhat
surprisingly, the congregation in which I spent the most number of
years as both an attendee and Sunday school leader / co-teacher tops
the chart as the one which demonstrated at least six major
deficiencies all at the same time. There were two main reasons my
wife and I stuck it out as long as we did. One was that the members
of our long-running Sunday school class were uniformly friendly and
devoted Christians who became like family to us. And as long as the
official leaders of the congregation did not take to take the time to
bother with us, we could pretty much run the class the way we wanted
without undue interference. With that said, let me rant a little bit
concerning the above listed deficiencies I saw in that church.
Politically-oriented
We were in Texas at the time, which is not exactly noted for its
flamingly liberal political views. But a group of influential women
at our church became scared to death that the Democrats were right on
the edge of actually electing someone of their party to office, which
of course would mean the total death of conservative Christianity in
our state. They formulated a plan by which those in the congregation
would overwhelm all the local political caucuses with our numbers to
get themselves elected to the national convention. I did not make
friends with any of them when I openly reminded them that it was the
meek Christian behavior of early believers under unbelievable
persecution which won over the Roman Empire, not by them raising an
army to take over the government. I even made the modest proposal
that instead we should hope and pray for government persecution since
that might change the hearts of those presently unsaved. My idea was
received with shocked unbelief.
Self-Centered
This attitude came clearly to the forefront when the church
leadership decded to eliminate the positions of pastors in charge of
mission support and of pastoral care. The decision came about not
because the offerings had begun to drop off, but because it was felt
that we shouldn't waste our time and resources on supporting those in
other parts of the country or those elderly and sick in our own
congregation who couldn't pay us back.
At the same time,
they fired the music minister since he liked to pick songs that would
appeal to both the older and younger members of the congregation. The
feeling was that the elderly were unlikely to be able to pay their
own way in terms of tithes and offerings whereas the younger members
were just beginning to hit their peak earning power.
Business
Model All but one of
the nominated and elected elders in the church during most of the
time I attended were independent businessmen, and that was precisely
why they were chosen. Even two of the education pastors over the
years told me that they were more than a little lacking in the basics
of biblical knowledge. And at one elder's meeting one of them kept
referring to the families in the church as “giving units,” since
that was really all they were to him. As a matter of fact, I know of
none of them who attended an adult Sunday school class. And the only
time they even deigned to teach a class themselves was when they got
excited over the popular “book-of-the-month” book which made a
mountain out of a molehill over one very obscure verse in the Old
Testament. Three of them were so excited, in fact, that without any
warning they kicked out the class that had been meeting in one of the
rooms for quite a while and left them to fend for themselves. And
after teaching on this subject for a little more than a month, those
elders departed just as quickly as they had come without warning any
of the attendees of their plans. The Adult Education Minister
subsequently wrote a scathing expose' of that particular book's
reasoning and presented it to the elder board. He didn't last much
longer at that job.
I knew the Adult
Education at the time, and he later filled me in on the utter
religious cluelessness exhibited by these elders, who also once
invited in a visiting speaker from the outside to expose all the lies
spread by scientists over the years in order to justify their
rejection of God. That “expert's” total resume consisted of a
large portrait of himself posing with President Reagan as well as his
own self-proclaimed academic title of “PhD in Science.” After the
extremely well-attended talk, which was full of utter nonsense which
some of the more educated people in the audience poked holes in
during the following Q and A session, I went up to the speaker and
asked him where he had gotten his so-called degree.” He stuttered
and totally turned his back on me in order to strike up a
conversation with the next nearest person.
Rigidly-Doctrinal
Although, as I said above, the elders at the time I was attending
this church knew next to nothing about the basic tenets of
Christianity, they swore by the detailed, 20+ doctrinal list to which
all new members had to subscribe. I eventually fell afoul of them
when I announced that I would not be putting in my official
membership because I had doubts regarding two of their doctrinal
points and definitely disagreed with another one which would have
excluded most of world-wide Christianity from membership. Since I was
a Sunday school leader at the time, the elders convened what amounted
to my heresy trial. It took the efforts of one of the more
enlightened junior pastors at that church to defend me and strike a
compromise in which I would agree not to speak on those particular
disputed subjects in church. And a little later, another associate
pastor had to carefully explain to the elder board that they had not
even understood what that most disputed point in their doctrinal
statement meant or even implied.
Perfection
in Everything This was
the time period in which Tom Peters was the business guru every major
company (including the one I worked for) followed. His goal was the
pursuit of Excellence, to be carried out using a variety of means,
one of which was to seek feedback from our internal and external
customers on how we could improve ourselves as a group. Since the
majority of our elders were businessmen, they immediately latched on
to this idea and had a questionnaire sent out to all regular attendees
with a variety of questions on it.
I was amazed when
they announced their results on a Sunday morning and said that the
majority of those in the congregation desired above all a church
service executed absolutely flawlessly. I polled all the people in my
Sunday school class and none of them had even thought of that as a
goal, much less the primary goal, of our church. I highly suspect
that the elders came up with their own conclusions before the poll
had even been conducted. The results were rather disastrous as every
ministry in the church was asked to conduct their work without any
mistakes. It even led to the point where (a) our head pastor was
dissatisfied with his performance in preaching a sermon because he
was suffering from a cold at the time. Thus, he preached the exact
same sermon a few weeks later when he felt he could do it more
justice. And (b) when our preemie grandchild was fighting for his
life in the hospital and we asked an elder for prayers from the
congregation when he gave announcements, it was not done because (we
believe) it would have set the Sunday morning time table back by a
minute or two.
The Worldly Church
This was the church in which I grew up. And although there were some
periods when we had a reasonably well educated and articulate
preacher as well as good Sunday school and youth group leaders, there
were much longer stretches in which the only joy in attending church
services was the chance to meet pretty girls and to inwardly laugh at
the faux pas which often came from the pulpit. This was strictly a
blue collar congregation composed of very nice people who were more
than content to leave the theology in the pulpit and not let it
unduly affect their normal lifestyle. Some of the pastors we ended up
with would have been utterly horrified to learn that many of the most
loyal attendees enjoyed smoking, drinking, gambling, and going to the
movies on a regular basis.
That's enough
letting off steam for now. I will continue in a companion post which
will also include some positive church models to emulate.