PROVERBS 5-7

 "How can I live a pure life in a culture that is drenched with immorality?”

Particularly, the subject of sexual immorality is in question. More particularly, we are going to be covering some passages in Proverbs 5-7 in which teenage boys are instructed to stay away from prostitutes and not to have affairs with married women.

The first problem I am faced with in teaching this lesson is a seeming disconnect between the original audience and our audience today, which may be considerably older.

Let's note who these words are addressed to::

My son, be attentive to my wisdom; incline your ear to my understanding. (5:1)

And now, my son, listen to me (5:7)

My son, keep your father's commandment, and do not forsake your mother's teaching. (6:20)

My son, keep my words and store up my commandments with you. (7:1)

And now, my sons, listen to me, and be attentive to the words of my mouth. (7:24)

These opening addresses should cause two problems to arise in our minds immediately: what about his daughters? My translation, NRSV, is gender neutral (inclusive) and has “child” and “children” in place of “son” and “sons”. This is a controversial area among Bible translators which has caused many evangelicals to reject the newest edition of the NIV Bible.

Let me cite two contrasting examples in an article in Christianity Today magazine (Oct. 27, 1997):

“There is a messianic prediction in Ps. 34:20: 'He Keeps all his bones; not one of them is broken.' (RSV) John's gospel refers to this with respect to Jesus' death. But many modern translations will not allow such a prediction about an individual man in Ps. 34, so the prediction is plural: 'He keeps all their bones.' The individuality of the messianic prediction, so wonderfully fulfilled in Jesus' death, is lost to readers, even though the prediction is singular in Hebrew.” On the other hand, the creation narratives tell that man was created in God's image, and that includes both male and female (see Genesis 1:27 and 5:2).

One side argues that the Hebrew language refers to all of humanity when it uses the words “man, son, he, etc.” so that they should be replaced with more neutral terms that apply to women as well. However, this causes problems on occasion, as noted above. Really, each verse must be considered separately to best determine how to translate it.

In the particular case of Proverbs 5-7, the original words were obviously addressed to boys since they are warned to stay away from loose women. Also it was the boys who were generally instructed by their parents and had more freedom of choice in such matters than the girls. Today all children, male and female, are equally exposed to learning and have pretty much equal chances of following a wise or foolish path in life.

The other issue is the age of the audience. Why should we pay attention when we are not only not children any more, but our children are all grown up and it is a little late to use these words to teach them? In reply, God's wisdom has something to say to people whatever their gender and whatever their age. Sexual immorality is not limited to males and doesn't necessarily stop at a certain time of life. The pastor who baptized me when I was a young boy ran off with a deacon's wife when he was about 60 years old.

WHAT IS THE NATURE OF THE TEACHING?

Read Proverbs 7:4-5: " Say to wisdom, 'You are my sister,' and call insight your intimate friend, that they may keep you from the strange woman and from the adulteress with her smooth words.” Two types to avoid: (1) the strange woman (NEB-loose, Jerusalem Bible-alien) and (2) the adulteress. NIV calls the strange woman “a wayward wife,” suggesting that she is the same as the adulteress – probably not the case.

The strange woman can possibly be a Jewish woman who disregards the Law, but more probably refers to someone from outside the Jewish community altogether. This was an issue for the Jews returning from the Exile; they were asked to divorce the foreign women they had married. This seems a bit harsh, but the alternative can unfortunately be seen in the life of Solomon himself in later years. (I Kings 11). Obviously, Solomon was much better at giving his advice in Proverbs than actually following it.

My wife and I warned our children when they started dating about the potential problems of marrying outside the faith (with mixed results). One of them said, “We're only dating. It isn't as if we are planning on getting married.” But look at the warning given in Proverbs 6:27-28. “Can fire be carried in the bosom without burning one's clothes? Or can one walk on hot coals without scorching the feet?” In dating, one thing can lead to another before you know it. Paul makes the same point in the NT by starting with an obscure regulation in Deuteronomy 22:9-11: “You shall not sow your vineyard with a second type of seed...You shall not plow with an ox and a donkey yoked together. You shall not wear clothes made of wool and linen woven together.” These commands were all to remind the Jews that they were a people set apart from the rest of the world and sanctified by God. Paul then applies this passage to mixed marriages in 2 Corinthians 6:14: “Do not be mismatched (literally, “mis-yoked”) with unbelievers. For what partnership is there between righteousness and lawlessness? Or what fellowship is there between light and darkness?”

The second warning in Proverbs 7:5 against committing adultery is self-obvious since it was part of the Ten Commandments. But it is interesting the practical reasons Solomon gives for avoiding it:

Proverbs 6:26 “...for a prostitute's fee is only a loaf of bread, but the wife of another stalks a man's very life.” There are two possible understandings for verse 26. Either a prostitute takes all your money and reduces you to only a loaf of bread and the adulteress preys upon your very life, or sleeping with a prostitute will cost you little money (a loaf of bread), but sleeping with someone else's wife may cost you all that you have.

Proverbs 6:30-35 Remember that the penalty for adultery was death.

Look at some more vivid images that Solomon uses to describe the consequences of giving in to sexual immorality with a loose woman:

5:4a she is bitter as wormwood (may seem sweet at the time, but it leaves a bitter taste. Bitter wormwood is associated with death in Revelation)

5:4b sharp as a two-edged sword (powerful and dangerous, the same image used for God's word)

5:10 strangers will take your wealth

5:14 ruined in the public assembly (lose your reputation)

5:22 you will be ensnared in your sin

5:23 you will die and be lost. The Living Bible interprets “die” literally to mean the consequences of a venereal disease, but “die and be lost” may refer to spiritual death as well.

The ultimate consequence is found in Revelation 22:15: “Outside are the dogs and sorcerers and fornicators and murderers and idolaters, and everyone who loves and practices falsehood.” The Greek word translated “fornicators” is pornoi, from which we get “pornography.” Other translations read “the impure or immoral persons.” Remember that immorality is not a victimless crime. There are consequences for all involved, including innocent family members.

WHY DO PEOPLE GET CAUGHT IN THE TRAP?

Proverbs 5:12-13,23 They hate discipline and instruction. The solution is given in 6:20-23 (and repeated in 7:1-3). The “commandments” mentioned in this passage are the teachings from parents and other wise people, such as we see in the Book of Proverbs. However, note the instruction in verse 21 “to bind them on your hearts and tie them around your neck.” This phrase actually is a quotation from Deuteronomy 6:7, referring to how we should treat the OT law. Thus, the wisdom teachings in Proverbs are treated as being on a par with the Law of Moses.

Solomon gives us a vivid short story to emphasize his point. Read 7:6-23. Most of this story is obvious, but one passage needs a little explanation: verses 14-15. If the woman is Jewish, then according to Leviticus 7:11ff, part of the meat from a peace offering was given to the priests, some was burned and the rest was given back to the worshiper and needed to be eaten by the following day if it was a vow. So, in effect she is saying, “Come to my house and help me eat up all this food because if you don't it will just go to waste.” On the other hand, if she is a Canaanite woman, it may have been an offering to a pagan goddess in which case sexual intercourse was generally part of the ritual. So the woman is either hypocritically using a Jewish religious ritual for the purpose of seducing the young man, or she is inviting him to be part of pagan worship.

Notice that this story is followed by another woman calling out to passers-by. Read 8:1-5.  This introduces the next subject:

RESISTING TEMPTATION

Are any of you chess players? The dual object of the game is to checkmate your opponent's king and avoid being checkmated yourself. There are ways of getting out of check to avoid checkmate.

1. Move your king out of danger (example of Joseph and Potiphar's wife.)

2. Destroy the attacker

3. Place a piece between you and the attacker that he can't touch.

1. The best solution is to avoid the situation before it happens—run away from temptation. Billy Graham made it a practice his whole career to never be alone with a woman other than his wife. But you can't isolate yourself in a nunnery or monastery. One member of my family attended a small Bible college. But beforehand, he had to sign an oath that he would not engage in mixed swimming or use playing cards. This avoidance approach is the same as Islam's veiling of women.

It is unfortunately getting harder today to completely avoid sexual temptation, especially in light of Jesus' words in Sermon on the Mount that looking at someone with lust in our heart is also committing adultery. Even Jimmy Carter admitted to having that fault. It is especially hard to avoid temptation due to the ready availability of porn on the Internet. I had lunch with young pastor who graduated not long ago from a prominent Bible seminary. The questionnaire of all entering freshmen used to be, “Do you have a problem with pornography?” Now it is “How much of a problem do you have with pornography?”

2. Destroy the attacker. But who is the attacker? If Satan, we know that only Christ will destroy him in the last days. Ultimately and unfortunately,  the attacker is inside ourselves. The Book of James is the closest thing in the NT that we have to the Book of Proverbs. James 1:12-16: “Blessed is anyone who endures temptation. Such a one has stood the test and will receive the crown of life that the Lord has promised to those who love him. No one, when tempted should say, “I am being tempted by God” for God cannot be tempted by evil and he himself tempts no one. But one is tempted by one's own desire, being lured and enticed by it; then when that desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin, and that sin, when it is fully grown gives birth to death.”

By the way, some scholars feel that this passage in James may have been based on the story that we just read in Proverbs 7 about the youth who is seduced. It is our own desires; we can't blame it on others. Some people claim sexual addictions are psychological or physical afflictions (which may been true), but that does not excuse the person who allows himself to start down the slippery slope in the first place. “Be not deceived, my beloved” is how the passage ends.

Just as in chess, a king has very limited attacking power by himself, we are powerless to fight these desires by ourselves.

3. We can't run away from all temptations to sin, we can't single-handedly destroy Satan and we can't conquer our own desires by our own strength So the third defensive approach is the best solution. My father-in-law, when he was a young pastor, was asked by an attractive young single woman to visit her at home to talk about something. He was a bit suspicious so he took his mother along with him. When the lady opened the door dressed in a skimpy negligee, he shoved his mother in front of him and introduced her. The woman slammed the door in their faces and came back in a few minutes dressed more appropriately. We can rely on the power of Jesus to come between us and temptation since he has already conquered Satan.

James 4:7: “Resist the Devil and he will flee from you.” This is similar to Jesus' saying in Matthew 16:18 about the gates of Hades (death itself) not being able to resist the power of the church.

However, as in chess, the best defense is a strong offense. So the best defense against immorality is to have a strong marriage. In today's world, unfortunately, marriage is not taken seriously enough. I was asked to facilitate a breakout group at a divorce counseling workshop. Only one of the participants was a man. He said that the reason he divorced his wife was because she had begun to put on weight.

The final word on the subject, as usual, comes from the Bible. Proverbs 5:18b: “Rejoice in the wife of your youth.” Don't try to trade your spouse in for a newer model and don't just stick with him or her out of a sense of duty, but actually rejoice in your spouse.

Why should God care so much about the state of our marriage?? There are the practical consequences of not being faithful, as we have seen. But there is another dimension that we haven't mentioned—a theological dimension.

It is interesting that the image of adultery appears throughout the Bible, especially in the Prophets. It is closely associated with idolatry, turning away from our commitment (to God or to our spouse) and following another.

Isaiah, in 54:5-8, treats Jerusalem (Israel) as the bride of God.

Hosea 2:16-20 uses Hosea's marriage as a type of God's marriage to Israel.

The Song of Songs may have the same underlying idea.

Jesus condemns the “evil and adulterous generation.” They had turned away from God.

2 Corinthians 11:2 shows that Paul treats the particular church at Corinth as the intended bride of Christ.

In Revelation 19-22, the city of New Jerusalem (standing for the whole church, according to most commentators) is the spotless bride of Christ.

In all of these passages, it is the corporate body of believers that is compared to the bride. However, this doesn't exclude the idea of an individual application. Paul puts it all together in Ephesians 5:31-33 when he quotes from Genesis 2: “For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife and the two will become one flesh. This is a great mystery and I take it to apply to Christ and the church.” 

We would say that the Genesis passage applies primarily to marriage and only secondarily to the relationship between Christ and the church. Paul takes the opposite point of view and states that the primary meaning behind marriage between two people is as a living example of how much Christ loves us. That is why the issue is so crucial and why each of us should view marriage in an even more important light than unbelievers do. So Paul concludes in verse 33, “Each of you, however, should love his wife as his very self, and a wife should give her husband all respect.”